|Mablethorpe on t'Sea|
The other day I took a couple of old coots from the village out for a trip (as part of an outreach programme) and their choice of treat was a visit to the electric cinema in Mablethorpe, to see 'Gravity' in the new three-dimensional moving pictures with sound version.
Had a thoroughly splendid time.
Mablethorpe is so small that it's marked as M'pe on the Ordnance Survey maps but it has the most splendid little multi-screen cinema. In summer they make enough money on the tourista trade to survive and in the winter months they keep the place open to amuse the knotty-pated locals. The entrance hall is about five metres by four, and that space includes the inevitable postcards, DVD sales, sweet stall, ticket booth and coffee machine - for tea and coffee is included in the price of a billet which is a brilliant idea in winter. The cheap seats are standard fare but the upper-crusties seats have legroom abounding and are padded with horse-hair and goose feathers. The whole operation successfully walks that line between being run by just two people and also being professional and slick. It's truly a hidden gem.
Gravity, on the other hand... how expensive must it have been to maintain all of those film crews in orbital space? I wonder how many clapper-board clackers they lost. The three-dimensional effects were stunning - with the glasses we all looked like the mice in Wallace and Gromit's cellar. Debris flying out of the screen, splashes of water to duck for and a depth to the vistas of planet Earth that I haven't experienced since my last Shuttle mission. Wonderful stuff. The film itself however...
Well, you know that feeling when the night train rushes past and the little hook arrangement that is supposed to oik you out of the trackside hammock like a sack of mail fails and you're left sat sitting there, all alone as the train (of thought and plot) thunders on? Well that's how Bullock and Clooney left me. I was rooting for them both to stop whining and get on with it and hurry up and die, and only Clooney obliged. How different a film might it have been with two different actors eh? Two who could, oh I don't know - act. A plot that, oh I don't know - didn't rely upon my caring whether either or both of the only two actors in the whole film lived, died or gave birth to twin possums while singing the American national anthem backwards...
The experience though was brilliant and the three-dimensional effects totally terrific and I am pleased to report that neither of the old coots had a bladder accident or anything.
I like this "3D" thing. I suspect that films are going to take on a whole new dimension in future.
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If you are within a couple of thousand miles of Mablethorpe I can thoroughly recommend the cinema there to you. A very civilised experience - easy (winter) parking, no kiddywinkles, coffee on tap...